Rant of the Nobodies....

I Don't get it? some people don't know what to say when they haven't been in a situation similar to mine, so your bound to get some comments that you find upsetting or not very helpful.

But people constantly saying to me i need to 'get over', 'forget', 'move on', start fresh', 'not think about it' really does NOT help!? How can you forget about a child you have lost? ok yes it was still growing inside of me, but does that stop me loving it? if they were here now they would be 3 years old, how can you 'forget' that?!

Some things are easier said than done, all i ask is that people walk a mile in my shoes and tell me they can do the things they suggest me to do, I am grateful that i lost my baby whilst it was still early on in my pregnancy, i worship the men and womens strength that have lost babies and children through infant loss i can't say i would be as strong! and could never think what it would be like for me to go through that! But the pain is still similar to me i lost a baby that would have grown into a beautiful child of my own that i love so much!, i wish everyday was different and i could go back to when i was pregnant, just to have 'that' feeling, to feel normal, to feel belonging, to feel something.

Instead i sit here feeling worthless, faded, a failure, a nobody!

I know that not many people understand me, and i am a very negative person, i wish i wasn't trust me! I annoy alot of people, and they try to avoid me, but all i ask is for them to imagine going through what i have gone through, imagine how I feel!!

I walk around with a smile on my face and act like i have no problems in the world but deep down i go to bed everynight wishing this was all a bad dream, but i wake up thinking, oh great another day of being a failure, a worthless, a nobody....